Sperm Donors Revisited
As I have been sharing my children with their father for the last three years and one month, and as I have expressed before, it has occurred to me that it would have been easier, and possibly preferable, to have children with an anonymous donor rather than someone who is in and out of their lives, who begrudges child support, and who now wants the kids but only because he’s married and has someone to help him out when they’re there. Someone who, once he gets divorced again and is out in the dating world, will expect to have minimal contact with them so he can be out doing his own thing.
Of course this is just what’s easier for me. Maybe, for a child, it would be embarrassing to have come from a sperm catalogue. Maybe they would resent me for not providing them with a father as well, even if he is only part-time at best and interested in them only on his own terms. Maybe not having a father in the picture every other weekend would kill my social life and make it impossible for me to date because I’d feel guilty hiring a babysitter. Maybe a father, no matter how substandard, is preferable to no father. Maybe..Maybe..Maybe…
sperm donor, sperm catalogue, father, parenting, mother, dating, marriage, child support, visitation
November 28th, 2006 at 1:21 pm
At some point in time the father may realize that his children are important to him and heal that relationship. With a donor, there was never a connection or relationship to heal.
On the other hand the appeal of having sole, uncontested custody of a child pulls at me as well.
November 28th, 2006 at 11:48 pm
Exactly!