Single Parent Sex

I’ll be the first to admit that I’m nowhere near having sex with anyone new, because frankly, I’m not dating anyone. But a lot of time is still spent thinking about single parent sex. Is it the same as when you’re single without children, or is it better? More challenging? Hotter? Quicker?
It may be a bit early for me to be considering single parent sex. But if my mind is on it already, isn’t that a good sign? I mean, with my first child, it took me years to feel like a sexual creature again. YEARS. I still cringe when I think about it. But this time around with my son, I was feeling randy almost immediately - like, as soon as the painkillers from the C-section wore off. Perhaps that’s a bit too much information, but I’m sure there’s a dad-to-be out there somewhere reading this and heaving a sigh of relief in the hopes his partner-in-crime feels the same way after giving birth.
I went searching the ‘net for single parent sex stories (the good, bad and ugly). Unfortunately I didn’t find much that was useful other than some mildly pornographic stories ala Penthouse style. Where were the real single parents, talking about how they managed to find time to have sex?
I’m sure many people just get a sitter or wait until the kids are asleep. The sitter will probably be my route, since I’m a huge advocate of introducing the kids only after a dating relationship has evolved into something I’m fairly certain will be of a serious nature. There are few things that make me wince more than seeing friends of mine parade their dates in front of their kids on a weekly basis. I’d rather provide my tweeny daughter with a better role model where possible, since I’m sure soon enough I’ll be dealing with her dates.
So tell me: for those of you who have had, or are having, single parent sex - how do you do it? When? How often? Were the kids around? Did they know your date before the two of you became intimate?
Photo Credit: Nevit Dilmen / stock.xchng




November 13th, 2008 at 2:32 pm
I have been a single mom for almost a year now and have just recently met someone I have been seeing. He is a single dad as well and we have little time to really go on “dates”. I usually get a sitter on an occasional evening and go over to his house after his son goes to bed. We spend a couple of hours watching a movie, talking or inevedibly having sex. I am out the door and back home by 10:00. At first I was put off by the fact that it seems like the only time we can see each other is at night after the kids are asleep. But I realize that being single with kids changes everything and you have to take the time when you can get it. Sure we haven’t had one of those marathon nights where I can spend the night and we can make love until the morning, but maybe that is a good thing. We are forced to talk on the phone a bit more and really get to know each other. It’s not the easiest way, but you really have to just be ok with it and take what you can get, never forgetting that your first priority is tucked in bed at home.