Dating with Children

Is he into you? (full article here)

How do women know if a guy is in hot pursuit?

-He can’t relax

-He connects the dots

-His focus is on you and only you

-He sneaks in a “we”

-He leads you on - in a good way

-He’s happy to be somewhere that’s normally not his scene

-He makes an effort with your friends

-He eagerly brings you into his inner circle

Anything else you would add to this list?

Three golfing partners died in a car wreck and went to heaven. Upon arrival they discover the most beautiful golf course they have ever seen. St. Peter tells them that they are all welcome to play the course, but he cautions them that there is only one rule:

Don’t hit the ducks.

The men all have blank expressions, and finally one of them asks “The ducks?”

“Yes”, St. Peter replies, “There are millions of ducks walking around the course and if one gets hit, he squawks then the one next to him squawks and soon they’re all squawkin to beat the band, and it really breaks the tranquility. If you hit the ducks, you’ll be punished, otherwise everything is yours to enjoy.”

After entering the course, the men noted that there was indeed a gaggle of ducks everywhere.

Within fifteen minutes, one of the guys hit one of them. The duck squawked, the one next to it squawked and soon there was a deafening roar of duck quacks.

St. Peter walked up with an extremely homely woman in tow and asked “Who hit the duck?”

The one who had done it admitted “I did.”

Immediately, St. Peter pulled out a pair of handcuffs and cuffed the man’s right hand to the homely woman’s left hand. “I told you not to hit the ducks,” he said.

“Now you’ll be handcuffed together for eternity.

The other two men were very cautious not to hit any ducks, but a couple of weeks later, one of them accidentally did. The quacks were as deafening as before and within minutes St. Peter walked up with an even uglier woman than before. St. Peter determined which one had hit the duck by the fear in his face, and cuffed the man’s right hand to the homely woman’s left hand.

“I told you not to hit the ducks”, he said. “Now you’ll be handcuffed together for eternity.”

The third man was extremely careful. Some days he wouldn’t even move for fear of even nudging a duck. After three months of this he still hadn’t hit a duck. St. Peter walked up to the man at the end of the three months and had with him a knock-out gorgeous woman, the most beautiful woman the man had ever seen. St. Peter smiled to the man and then, without a word, handcuffed him to the beautiful woman and walked off.

The man, knowing that he would be handcuffed to this woman for eternity, let out a sigh and said “What have I done to deserve this?”

The woman responded “I don’t know about you, but I hit a duck.”

The problem with being a divorced parent with the other parent involved in the kids’ life is that, even if you think your ex is the Spawn of Satan, he/she is still the other parent of your children. That makes things like taking a job in another state difficult, to say the least.

To backtrack, I had to resign my job in BFE, Montana due to a principal who is also the Spawn of Satan. (I guess that makes she and my ex related?) I applied for job after job after job here and there, trying to stay within a few hours of Helena, Montana, where my ex lives.

I was asked to apply in a school district in Utah, but at first refused because it’s just too far from the kids’ dad. As I got turned down for job after job, I started getting discouraged and thought I’d better apply in Utah as a backup plan. After I applied, I had a couple of interviews and POOF had a job!

There was then the long and arduous process of getting a new parenting plan worked out with the kids’ dad. It isn’t exactly what I wanted, but it’s okay, and now we are in the process of packing up our little log cabin in the woods and making an offer on a house in Northern Utah!

If anyone has experience with moving kids away from the non-custodial parent and has advice to offer those of us considering this, or if you need advice on parenting plans from me, please let me know and I’ll go into further detail!

In the meantime, enjoy the summer and all of the dating opportunities it brings!

Cheers!

what marriage is like

King Arthur was ambushed and imprisoned by the monarch of a neighboring kingdom. The monarch could have killed him but was moved by Arthur’s youth and ideals. So, the monarch offered him his freedom, as long as he could answer a very difficult question. Arthur would have a year to figure out the answer and, if after a year, he still had no answer, he would be put to death.

The question?…What do women really want? Such a question would perplex even the most knowledgeable man, and to young Arthur, it seemed an impossible query. But, since it was better than death, he accepted the monarch’s proposition to have an answer by year’s end.

He returned to his kingdom and began to poll everyone: the princess, the priests, the wise men and even the court jester. He spoke with everyone, but no one could give him a satisfactory answer.

Many people advised him to consult the old witch, for only she would have the answer.

But the price would be high; as the witch was famous throughout the kingdom for the exorbitant prices she charged.

The last day of the year arrived and Arthur had no choice but to talk to the witch. She agreed to answer the question, but he would have to agree to her price first.

The old witch wanted to marry Sir Lancelot, the most noble of the Knights of the Round Table and Arthur’s closest friend!

Young Arthur was horrified. She was hunchbacked and hideous, had only one tooth, smelled like sewage, made obscene noises, etc. He had never encountered such a repugnant creature in all his life.

He refused to force his friend to marry her and endure such a terrible burden; but Lancelot, learning of the proposal, spoke with Arthur.

He said nothing was too big of a sacrifice compared to Arthur’s life and the preservation of the Round Table.

Hence, a wedding was proclaimed and the witch answered Arthur’s question thus:

What a woman really wants, she answered….is to be in charge of her own life.

Everyone in the kingdom instantly knew that the witch had uttered a great truth and that Arthur’s life would be spared.

And so it was, the neighboring monarch granted Arthur his freedom and Lancelot and the witch had a wonderful wedding.

The honeymoon hour approached and Lancelot, steeling himself for a horrific experience, entered the bedroom. But, what a sight awaited him. The most beautiful woman he had ever seen lay before him on the bed. The astounded Lancelot asked what had happened

The beauty replied that since he had been so kind to her when she appeared as a witch, she would henceforth, be her horrible deformed self only half the time and the beautiful maiden the other half.

Which would he prefer? Beautiful during the day….or night?

Lancelot pondered the predicament. During the day, a beautiful woman to show off to his friends, but at night, in the privacy of his castle, an old witch? Or, would he prefer having a hideous witch during the day, but by night, a beautiful woman for him to enjoy wondrous intimate moments?

What would YOU do?

What Lancelot chose is below. BUT….make YOUR choice before you scroll down below. OKAY?

Noble Lancelot said that he would allow HER to make the choice herself.

Upon hearing this, she announced that she would be beautiful all the time because he had respected her enough to let her be in charge of her own life.

Now….what is the moral to this story?

The moral is…..
If you don’t let a woman have her own way….
Things are going to get ugly

As single parents, we often have an extra burden of financial difficulties to follow us. Have you searched for jobs and landed an interview only to find that you have nothing to wear to the interview? Worse, you can’t afford to purchase a new suit?

There is an organization called Dress for Success that helps financially less privileged women by contributing an interview suit to her so she can land a better job. It doesn’t specifiy single women or single mothers, but like I said: We are more likely to be financially strapped than others.

Snipped from their site:

Since 1997, Dress for Success has served almost 300,000 women around the world. Each year we reach more than 40,000 women in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom and New Zealand. All Dress for Success organizations are not-for-profit entities, with Dress for Success Worldwide and its U.S. affiliates having 501(c)(3) charitable status.

Dress for Success serves clients by referral only, and women must have an interview scheduled before receiving clothing. Our clients come to us from a continually expanding and diverse group of non-profit and government agencies including homeless shelters, immigration services, job training programs, educational institutions and domestic violence shelters, among many other organizations. More than 2,500 organizations throughout the world send women to Dress for Success for professional apparel and career development services.

If you would like to read the rest of the description of this program, click HERE.

Good luck to you!

First-Date Fashion for Women
By Emily Yuen

You’ve got one hour until you’re due at the local coffeehouse for cappuccino and scintillating conversation (you hope!)—and you’re staring blankly into your closet wondering what to wear. It’s the first time you’ll be coming face to face with the same man you’ve e-mailed with countless times, and perhaps shared a few phone conversations, and you want to command the same power in person as you did online.

Dress, of course, is an integral part of your presentation. It’s one part dressing for the occasion and another part preserving who you are at the core. On a first glance fashion tells your story—it holds clues to your personality, conveys how you’re feeling, and even how you want him to feel about you when he sees you.

When you’re staring down a questionable closet with no time to spare, the only thing on your mind is that you want to be at your best, both inside and out—but don’t sweat it!

Face your fashion fears and step out in style to your first date this season with these Spring-into- Summer fashion basics that will first amplify your own style and then teach you a few new tricks to take your right now to wow. With these recipes of basic tips, simple pairings, and a bit of accessorizing, you will feel confident in your ability to cook up a delicious outfit for any occasion.

The Cinderella (Formal)
A dinner for two and a table reserved for 8 p.m. On the menu: yellow tail and tuna tartare, smoked duck confit and seared foie gras. On you: a strapless embroidered number, with threading of metallic silver throughout, an empire waist, and pleated bubble skirt.

When romance calls, your outfit must speak to the moment. How do you achieve a look that’s “happily ever after”? By accessorizing a classic wardrobe favorite: the black dress.

Go Classic:
A black cocktail dress should be a staple item in your closet. A classic cut can be your go-to piece for years. One dress can be “worn” in so many ways, projecting a different attitude each time by simply changing your hair, shoes, jewelry, or handbag. Just think of the black dress as your groundwork. Make it your own with the items you choose to accessorize with.

Add a cropped jacket to change the tone—jacket on can be shy and mysterious and jacket off can be revealing and sensual. If you’d prefer pants, try a pair of black satiny trousers paired with a Victorian-styled ruffled blouse.

Quick Tip:
In addition to adding a layer of depth to your outfit, a coverup can also act as a shield against a cool summer night or an over-air-conditioned restaurant.

Jazz Up:

Colored pashmina
Patent leather clutch
A neckline of costume pearls
Metallic wide headband
Jeweled high-heels
Ballet flats (Trend alert: Try gold or silver, glittered or patent leather)
Go Trendy:
Blue is the new black. Hues of rich navy, like a sailor blue, are the power shades of late. Take it to the next level and try something decorated with rosettes, gold or silver trim, lace or embroidery.

Where this works:

Romantic dinner
Theater

The Manhattan (City/Urban Chic)

Don’t have the time to make a pit stop at home after work? No problem! This city girl dresses for work and play—mixing and matching convertible pieces for a high-powered day and high-powered night. Here are a few small changes that can transform your executive 9-to-6 wear into that magical date at 8.

Go Classic:
The key to winning this look is to accessorize and layer. Each piece accommodates the other in creating the perfect packaged deal.

The concept is clean and tailored—layer a white tie blazer over a camisole and match with a pair of trousers or a pencil skirt.

The blazer is universally functional in that it works to complement any outfit—it’s corporate enough for the workday and sassy enough for a rendezvous in town.

Instead of a camisole, try a fitted button-down with puffed sleeves or a patterned silk blouse with a delicate tie-neck.

Count on the pair of pants or the skirt that flatters your body type the best. It’s more important to fit your body than it is to fit the trend. Knowing your best features are accentuated can make you feel both confident and attractive.

Quick Tip:
Go bolder on the shoes when trying to spice up a conservative outfit. Experiment with red or a zebra print.

Jazz Up:

Wide belts cinched at the waist
Large leather carry-alls
Tortoise shell sunglasses
Peep-toe flats in patent leather or animal print
Double-strapped Mary Jane pumps
Earth inspired jewelry—wooden bangles, turquoise necklaces
Oversized cocktail rings
Go Trendy:
Celebrate spring with a cap-sleeved wrap dress of brightly colored flowers against a white sheath. Go daring with your color choice. This season’s most popular shades are cobalt blue and bright yellow.

Or try an ankle pant with a bubble tank. Throw on a linen cropped blazer for the workday.

Where This Works:

Happy hour
Casual dinner
Casual party
A night out in town

The Betty (Casual)

Want a look that’s laid-back but still playfully romantic and feminine? Casual is comfortable but being comfortable doesn’t mean you have to compromise style. Here’s how to get a look that’s casual, easy-going and breezy.

Go Classic:
To embody this look, choose light fabrics such as linen and cotton jersey. Combine a patterned full skirt with solid colored tee or sleeveless top. Another option is to slip on a pair of cuffed shorts or capris. Pair with a knit tunic and belt, if desired.

Quick Tip:
When putting together separates, if wearing a patterned bottom, balance with a plain top or vice-versa. Two loud pieces will make for a screaming outfit.

Jazz Up:

Ankle-tie wedge espadrilles
Embellished flat-thong sandals
Head scarf
Straw totes
Ballet flats
Chunky plastic beaded necklaces and bracelets
Go Trendy:
Try a linen shirt dress with a tie waist in a neutral color such as brown, black or white. Quick Tip: Dress up with a patterned headscarf and embellished sandals.

Experiment with floaty jersey dresses in trendy cuts (Trend alert: Some of the “now” styles are baby doll, bubble, and trapeze). Though, a classic halter or sleeveless scoop neck works just as well.

Where This Works:

Museum
Walk in the park
Coffee

The Good Sport (Athletic)

There’s something for every occasion—you have the casual day outfit, the night outfit, and even the in-between outfit, but how about the play outfit? That something you can run in and “cheer for your favorite team” in—the one you can jump through hoops in and look fabulous doing it.

Go Classic:
Start with pieces that are fluid and easy to move in. If you plan to be outdoors all day, choose breathable materials like cottons and linens.

Quick Tip: When dressing for an active afternoon, go for easy-to-wash pieces so you can play as hard as you want without the worry that you’ll ruin your clothes.

It’s as easy as pairing a basic tank or tee with blue jeans. In this case and in most cases, your opportunity to dress up your outfit lies in how you accessorize.

If your date involves sand and water, experiment with fun geometric patterns and floral arrangements when choosing beachwear. Wrap a patterned sarong around your legs or slip on a light linen kaftan tunic as your cover up.

Jazz Up:

Assorted bangles
Hoop earrings
Brightly colored sarongs
Clear vinyl beach bag
Colored flip-flops
Straw beach hat
Go Trendy:
Combine a flowy apron tank with khaki capris or do the reverse and play up the capris with plaid or stripes while keeping the top basic. Take your capris one step further and try a cargo style for a sportier look.

If at a sporting event, don’t forget to pull out the team paraphernalia. It’s easy to layer your favorite player’s jersey over a coordinating basic and jeans!

Where this works:

Sporting event
Hiking
Beach

I rarely “fight” with my ex, but when I have to, it’s a doozy. The problem of the week…month…year…is that I find myself in need of finding a job for the next school year. I briefly considered entering the private sector, but as I can’t stand the thought of putting four kids in daycare during the summers, I’ve been set on finding another teaching contract.

Guess what? I found one! I was offered a great job teaching in Northern Utah. Now begins the fight. Can I move out of state with the kids? Well, our parenting plan says that I have to get ex’s permission to move the kids out of Montana. Mind you, I can stay IN Montana and live much farther away than Northern Utah, but the ex must have just been looking for something to fight about.

I think that he feels that if he blocks this opportunity, I’ll come running back to Helena with my tail between my legs begging for his help. Of course for my own mental health, I’ll never live in Helena again as long as he’s there. I just can’t deal. My kids need me to be sane. My potential students need me to be sane. Pretty much everyone I come into contact with would be better off if I weren’t freaking out about living near my ex and having him drive past my house all the time. (he used to do that when I lived there)

So let’s get this moving show on the road dangit!!!!!